Wrap it up, Pens.

I really have no words for this picture Jenn sent me;
malsby

But it’s ok because Fantastic Max had the words for me…
fm3

It’s very STD sounding. It doesn’t roll off the tongue like Brangelina.

EDIT: Alright, so to shake off the summer doldrums, I ask you to come up with the most awkward/inappropriate name mashup for your own fake half and half jersey. They must currently play on the same team. No mixing teams or rosters. Tell me which team and players, in other words show your work. Do your best to split names in half or close to it. No subbing out one letter. You are free to enter as many times as you like. And next Saturday I will pick one I like best and you get a Tokarski Saves shirt. Savvy?

AND…Check out volume three of Cock Knockers Incorporated the chronicles of Sean Avery at Vogue which is a collab between Loser Domi and I. And if you are behind in the story, no worries Domi linked one and two.

While we are at it, let’s do a Get In the Box link round up;

-Q-girl muses on her hockey player love. Bonus, the post contains the best pick up line ever I will probably start using.

-Jenn and I are still doing that Hockey Hottie Dreamy Team. It’s nearly over. Kinda sorta. Vote on her page and scroll down a few to vote here on my page.

-Alix over at Humming Giraffe linked an article about her favorite Swede. Swedes are universally awesome.

-Jared of London writes about just how he became a Die Hard Blue and White.

-It is established the ladies love MYFO now can we all do them, ahem, a favor and vote for them?

-OMGWTF?TML. I love internet memes! It’s why I love the Weezer vid for Pork and Beans so much.

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40 thoughts on “Wrap it up, Pens.

  1. what could possibly compel someone to buy that most hideous jersey? half/half jerseys were so cool, like 15 freaking years ago! only a pens fan, man, only a pens fan.

    and i love the “that’s a girl’s name” tag.

  2. no but it’s a neat idea. and im a habs fan anyway. i’d have Kovasarek or Halavalev or Dandepierre lol

  3. New game kids!

    What two players names can be mashed together for the most awkward/inapropriate moniker!

    Winner gets a Tokarski Saves shirt. No, seriously. You have to come up with one better than Malsby.

  4. Oh my gosh! That’s HIDEOUS! HAHAHA. Thanks for bringing it to my attention.

    Hmmm…Keslurrows? Weldichuk? Sedieksa? Ohldler? Luongford? Raymetria?

  5. The fact that one side is away and the other is home makes it batter.

    Lemme think…how do you like:

    Brymas McCaberle?
    MatsMatt Sunjan?
    Nikxei Antorovsky?

    Hmmm…I’ll have to think more about this. Let me get back to you.

  6. is there anyone in the league who’s last name rhymes with laid? too bad if there is that he doesn’t play with Ryan Getzlaf.

  7. it’s a shame Ryan Malone left the Penguins, otherwise some other misguided Shittsburgh fan could have rocked a “Staalone” jersey.

    dammit.

  8. This is harder than it sounds but here are a few:

    Dallas Stars- Mark Fistric + Phillipe Boucher = FistHer…. well only with lots of lube!!
    Minn. Wild- Pierre Marc Bouchard + Marek Zidlicky = BouchLicky…. you know girls like oral too!
    – Nicklas Backstrom + Marek Zidlicky = BackLicky…. mmmm tastes like chicken
    LA Kings- Brian Boyle + Alexander Frolov = BoyLov…. even Californians shoul have their limits!

    Now if you don’t mind I’m going to go take a shower and try to wash the dirt off….

  9. san jose: Cheechoo and Marleau – Cheecheau (like a fine wine)
    san jose: ehrhoff and cheechoo – Ehrchoo (a sneeze gone horribly wrong)
    detroit: hudler and chelios – Hudlios (she gave me hudlios, man)
    edmonton: horcoff and penner – Horner (giggity, giggity!)
    edmonton: broziak and stortini – Brodztini (for the ladies to order at happy hour in Deadmonton; it packs a punch)
    chicago: seabrook and wisniewski – Seabriewski (Chicago’s favourite ale)
    calgary: phaneuf and bertuzzi – Phanuzzi (only because it sounds ridiculous)

  10. Hedburn – Johan Hedberg + Chris Thorburn.

    Klittle – Bryan Little + Ken Klee.

    TootHol – Jordin TooToo + Scott Nichol.

  11. Ok…round two! I’m still kind of partial to BouchLicky but how about:
    Col Avs- Kyle Cumiskey + Cody McLeod = CumLeod…. I’m a screamer..what can I say
    FL Panthers- Keith Ballard + Michael Frolik = BallLik…. she and BouchLicky make a perfect couple!
    Philly Flyers- Simone Gagne + Mike Richards = GagHards…. I would yack to if I was a philly fan
    – Simone Gagne + Derian Hatcher = GagHer…. so she likes the kinky stuff

    It’s hard being a hockey addict in the summer. I can’t wait for trianing camp and pre-season to start! Thanks for giving me something a little like hockey… but I think you are corupting all our clean minds with dirty thoughts! I guess I really want the Tokarski Saves shirt! Have a great day!

  12. OK, round two for Leafs players:
    Niktis Antroseph (Nik Antropov + Curtis Joseph)
    Alevel Steebina (Alex Steen + Pavel Kubina)
    Jefats Findin (Jeff Finger + Mats Sundin)
    Dominfan Kronoore (Dominic Moore + Steffan Kronwall)
    Alarlo Colaiarovsky (Carlo Colaiacovo + Alexei Ponikarovsky)
    Jirsa Toskusty (Jiri Tlusty + Vesa Toskala)

  13. NJ Devils
    Bobby Holik + Sheldon Brookbank = Hobank
    Colin White + Bobby Holic = Whilic ?
    Johnny Oduya + Bobby Holic = Odulic
    anyway the lics go on and on.

    I personally prefer Holic + Parise = Hoise (pronounced Ho-ezay – like me)

  14. Granted from the 06-07 Leafs:

    Pecker – Mike Peca + Darcy Tucker

    Nevermind the name, the Leafs jersey itself is a hilarious joke.

  15. Of course as soon as I post I think of more. Sorry to be “that guy” with the double posts but:

    Douche – Drew Doughty + Robert Esche
    Porque – Chris Porter + Chris Bourque
    Datgood – Pavel Dasyuk + Chris Osgood (Detroit)
    Conman – Tim Connolly + Toni Lydman (Buffalo)
    Hartburn – Scott Hartnell + Braydon Coburn (Philly)
    Gagburn – Simon Gagne + Braydon Coburn (Philly)

  16. No worries on the extra posting Tuo. If you got em, keep em coming.

    Meaghan, that sounds like something delicious I would spread on a cracker. Me likey.

  17. Oh, Heatzza is delicious. Scores a lot, too. Not many other teams have such a potent and magnificently named duo. There is Malsby in Pittsburgh, and then of course the legendary Zettersooooooook in Detroit.

    If we can contribute combos from international hockey to this discussion, then I would add Team Canada’s awesome top line from this year’s World Championships, known to me always as Heatzlash.

  18. I’d buy two Pascal DuPuis jerseys and rock “DuPuisPuis”

    (You down wit P-DuPuis, yeah you know me!)

  19. MoorDubi(s) – Greg Moore + Brandon Dubinsky.

    Gory – Scott Gomez + Chris Drury.

    Dome – Scott Gomez + Chris Drury.

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