Stiletto Sean Avery meets Stiletto Alexander Ovechkin

Hey all, this is Lori from Hockey, Football, and Stiletto Shoes. I’m here to pay you a visit while your blog owner, Wrap Around Curl, visits the state of Oregon and promptly drinks it under the table. I’ve brought with me all of our favorite, strapping hockey boys… but here’s the kicker: they’re all in stiletto shoe form.

Eric Godard:

Rawr.
Rawr. These are for your red pimpin’ suit.

Tyler Kennedy:

Here we see Tyler Kennedy's nose reinterpreted these in high fashion ankle boots.
Tyler Kennedy’s has been nose transformed into high fashion ankle boots.

Martin Brodeur:

I may or may not be calling him a fat ass.
I may or may not be calling him a fat ass.

Kris Letang:

When is the last time you saw a unicorn drawing WITHOUT Kris Leang? That's what I thought.
When is the last time you saw a unicorn drawing WITHOUT Kris Leang? ┬áThat’s what I thought.

Scott Hartnell/ Chris Pronger:

The Ed Hardy of shoes. The wearer of this shoe is probably a douche that thinks that they are a badass. Is this a shoe or a butt plug? Much like Pronger and Hartnell, we'll never know.
The Ed Hardy of shoes. The wearer of this shoe is probably a douche that thinks that they are a badass. Is this a shoe or a butt plug? Much like Pronger and Hartnell, we’ll never know.

Marc-Andre Fleury:

They're fun, cute, they don't entirely make sense, and.. well.. let's just pretend they're French.
They’re fun, cute, they don’t entirely make sense, and.. well.. let’s just pretend they’re French.

Max Talbot:

Just because he's a womanizer and an attention whore doesn't mean he isn't really damn good at it. Consider that tip jar full.
Just because he’s a womanizer and an attention whore doesn’t mean he isn’t really damn good at it. Consider that tip jar full.

Jordan Staal:

Insert sod joke here. Btw, did you know he has brothers?
Insert sod joke here. Btw, did you know he has brothers?

Jonathan Towes:

Because now that Patrick Kane is a delinquent, Towes is "the good one" of the two. He's goddamn adorable and doesn't look a day over twelve.
Because now that Patrick Kane is a delinquent, Towes is “the good one” of the two. He’s goddamn adorable and doesn’t look a day over twelve.

Now for the galleries. Sean Avery:

All the pizzaz with a side of badass.
All the pizzaz with a side of badass.
He would actually wear these.
He would actually wear these…
but only after he finishes checking himself out in these.
….but only after he finishes checking himself out in these.

Alexander Ovechkin:

Divalicious.
Divalicious.
Do you like being constantly aware of how hot you are? The flair on these boots doubles a mirror. Looking good...
Do you like being constantly aware of how hot you are? The flair on these boots doubles a mirror. Looking good…
There is a disco ball on the heel of these shoes. If that's not badass, I don't know what is.
There is a disco ball on the heel of these shoes. If that’s not badass, I don’t know what is.

23 thoughts on “Stiletto Sean Avery meets Stiletto Alexander Ovechkin

  1. OMG the kinds of things Avery would be saying to himself in the mirror as he posed in those spiked stilettos would make Alexis Texas blush.

  2. PS: Please don’t let your loved ones leave the house in Ed Hardy apparel. I do believe Pronger’s shoe has a dildo for a heel.

  3. The Letang shoe is pretty perfect.

    As for Talbot’s, I wonder how hard it is to walk with a heel full of change.

    Side note – that really makes sense for Montreal strippers. Canadian 1’s and 2’s are in coin form. There’s likely nothing more demoralizing for a stripper with long nails then to see her try and pick up her tips. She should either invest in that shoe or a pooper scooper.

  4. Where do you find pictures of shoes like this? Awesome. Love Godard’s pimp’n shoes! I can actually see him wearing them! But those Hartnell/Pronger shoes have to be the best of the bunch. What a fabulous representation of those guys in shoe form. But what does it say about me if I personally love the Towes shoes the best?

    • I mean, Towes might ask you to go to the local Diner to get sody pops, but if he’s not cheap like Kane and wants to use his salary to buy you more shoes… I’d say it’s a win.

  5. I really really really want the Divalicious shoes. And the disco ball heel ones. And the last ones of Avery gallerie…

    • Popgloss.com and shoelust.tumblr.com. Those are stellar sites for the somewhat avant garde shoes.

  6. Love them! I chuckled way to many times to myself. This gives me ideas for what the Chiefs players would be….hmmmmmm

  7. Love all these–they are too perfect! The Ovechkin mirrored boots, the Fleury whatever-the-hell-those-are, Talbot’s tip jar heels, all the ones for Avery…awesome, just awesome. WAC’s blog is in good hands!

    I am actually thinking of blatantly ripping off paying homage to you and your idea, but using NASCAR drivers. But I live in flip-flops, sneakers, and ballet flats. (Don’t hold that against me.) Perhaps something involving nail polish….

  8. Absolutely fabulous.
    Poor Marty Brodeur! He’s not fat, he’s big-boned. (And fat girls need love too)

  9. This is just about the best thing I’ve ever seen. I would wear those little Tyler Kennedys and Marc-Andre Fleurys. To death. Even though they look like pianos.

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