I reblogged this to my tumblr. I have one of those. I have for years. Anyway.

I MEAN ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME? WHY DIDN’T YOU CALL THAT GODDAMNED PENALTY. I WILL KEY YOUR FUCKING CAR, REF. AND POUR SUGAR IN YOUR GAS TANK. OH FOR THE FUCK OF SHIT, YOU WEREN’T EVEN TRIPPED. YOU DRAMATIC DIVING MOTHERFUCKER. WALK IT OFF, OK? I MEAN IF I COULD CLIMB THIS FUCKEN GLASS I’D GET OUT THERE AND SCORE THE GODDAMNED GOALS MYSELF BECAUSE OBVIOUSLY YOU CAN’T BOTHER TO DO SO. FUCKING HELL, YOU’RE KILLING ME SMALLS. JESUS, IS THIS PERIOD OVER YET? THIS HAS BEEN THE WORST GODDAMNED TWENTY MINUTES OF PLAY EVER AND I GOTTA TAKE A PISS. OH AND I NEED A FUCKEN PRETZEL WITH CHEESE. WELL FUCKEN FIGHT ALREADY IF YOU YOU’RE GONNA KEEP CHIRPING. GOD I DON’T EVEN KNOW WHY I WATCH THIS TEAM SOMETIMES. ITS LIKE THEY FUCKEN HATE ME AND DON’T WANT ME TO BE HAPPY BECAUSE THEY HATE TRYING TO WIN A CUNTING GAME. SOMEBODY HIT SOMEONE I AM SO FUCKEN BORED. JESUS FUCKING HOLD ME, I HATE OVERTIME. I’M GONNA FUCKEN DIE BECAUSE I CAN’T BREATHE. JUST TELL ME WHEN THEY WIN, OK? I CAN’T FUCKEN WATCH.